My Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad Day

Last night I had nightmares, and when Bekah woke me up she scared me to death. That’s when I knew it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. When I got up, I found out that I had a million billion extra chores to do because Daniel and Mama were gone for the day and I could tell that it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.


Downstairs when I was eating breakfast, the fire alarm kept beeping every thirty minutes because the battery was dying and ADT couldn’t tell us what kind of batteries it needed and it was driving me crazy.

I think I’ll move to Australia.

When Daddy finally got the battery changed, the fire alarm went off and the siren grates on my nerves something awful. Afterwards, something still kept beeping and I thought I was going insane until Daddy heard it too but he had no idea what it was either.

I could tell it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

Daddy finally figured out what was beeping this time, so he went downstairs to fix it and Bekah and I started to watch Monsters vs. Aliens. We didn’t get very far, though, because pretty soon the siren went off again. This time it was because Daddy saw that the light for the carbon monoxide alarm was blinking, so he pressed the “Test Carbon Monoxide Alarm” button like he was told to.

Then ADT called the fire department even though Daddy told them not to, so then the police came and Daddy had to tell them nothing was wrong. Then he went downstairs again so I had to answer the door when the fire department came and told me they were bringing a fire truck.

When the fire truck drove up a lot of firemen came into our house with a bunch of scanners and I had to give them our last name and home phone number because Daddy was busy trying to convince them that everything was fine.

It was a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

I could tell because after we finally finished the movie I tried to call Ashlea but I guess somebody was on the internet because the phone kept ringing and ringing and ringing and the answering machine didn’t even pick up. When I called later, she said they’ll be getting high speed internet next week.

“Next week,” I said, “I’m going to be in Australia.”


But instead, I had to go eat at the Chinese restaurant for dinner. Yuck, I hate Chinese. And on the way there we drove past a girl I haven’t seen in over a year and she scowled at me because she always scowls at me. And then when I actually found something I liked to eat at the restaurant I dropped it and made a huge sticky mess all over my clothes and then Bekah’s shrimp kept staring at me and it made me lose my appetite.


After dinner we went to Menard’s and Bekah made fun of me because I wanted some of the colorful light bulbs for my room and apparently I spin around in circles when I’m bored.

It was a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.


Daddy says some days are like that.

Even in Australia.